Thursday, May 5, 2011

The Troll Code, Part 1

Well, there is a Summoner's Code, so why not a Troll Code! This code of conduct are rules of behavior which govern all Trolls in our favorite game, League of Legends. And quite possibly, in every game that they play, or even every part of their lives! These articles are all from my own personal observations, mind you, so all of it is legit! But first, let's define a Troll...

The Troll Code, Part 1

Definition of a Troll:

1. Noun. One of many unsung internet heroes who are almost entirely misunderstood. Contrary to popular belief, many trolls are actually quite intelligent. Their habitual attacks in-game are usually a result of their awareness of the pretentiousness and excessive self-importance of many League of Legends enthusiasts. As much as people may hate Trolls, they are highly effective - their actions bring much of the stupidity of other players out into the great wide open.

Just kidding! Now that was Trolling lol! OK OK, so this definition is not the definition we want to use for our Troll Code. Here is our real definition of Troll, taken from at this link, with a few modifications of yours truly for the purposes of this article:

2. Noun. People who send empty and meaningless messages, purely to provoke.
Such people are mentally ill and have severe personality issues and insecurity as well as the average mind/priorities of a twelve year old.

Some people just can't grow out of the period in their life when scribbling on the walls and dropping spiders on the girls they liked was acceptable. At 20-30yrs of age, it's just pathetic.

Trolls don't care about proving a point or championing a cause. They just want to annoy, for the sake of annoyance and personal enjoyment, like a baby is entertained by a rattle or colorful lights.
They may tack on a "point" to draw out specific types of people but, it really doesn't matter. They're all the same. They all say the same shit. They all have the same excuses. They all fall back on the same responses and, they all share the same obliviousness to how stupid and pointless their lives are.

The troll is easily amused by things only the most retarded, unfunny child would appreciate.

They celebrate getting a reaction, that's it. Generally, they are so desperate for human interaction and, they are usually so vile, that negative attention is the best they can get. The saddest thing is, anyone can get a reaction by acting like an idiot. Anyone. They honestly take pride in the "art" like they've actually accomplished something.

It's astonishing to watch them brag about something 90% of the world would be embarrassed to even consider.

Don't let the occasional "smart" troll fool you. There is no "art" to it. It's a self loathing tool with anonymity to shield him, doing stupid things and when someone tells them they're making an ass of themselves, they dance around like some great mastermind who manipulated the psyches of those around them through careful planning and psychology, when in reality, they're a retard who shit in the public fountain and laughed when everyone looked.

Trolls have existed since ancient times, when they were referred to as the "village idiot" or "town drunk" a quixotic hero in their own mind, that the rest of the world pities in disgust.

Said disgust, isn't a victory, trolls. You've lost. Pray you never realize it. Ignorance truly is bliss and, you're the happiest motherfuckers around. Go see a shrink and tell them that you find enjoyment in pissing people off and try to look surprised when they tell you, you've got serious mental problems.
Troll this. *finger*

Oh, he sure hit the nail on the head with this definition! This expresses exactly how I feel right now! Anyhow, this entry has gone longer than expected, so stay tuned for The Troll Code, Part 2: Trolls in Action!

Thank you for reading my post!  Please don't forget to tell your friends about my website, Gosu League of Legends @, or otherwise known as How to win League of Legends games!(

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